When I was volunteering at a crisis line for a year a repeat caller seemed to find it extremely helpful when I asked a variety of distracting questions and statements. The one common theme that tied them all together was to phrase things in threes. People in crisis tend to be in fight-or-flight mode and as a result may find it harder to think about anything else other than the immediate threat they perceive. By directing focus to one topic and coming up with 3 examples you can start to slow down your racing thoughts and engage in a grounding technique that stabilizes breathing and decreases overall anxiety in the moment.
Getting through a triggering or unsafe moment is the hardest part. This exercise I used to guide that caller through one, and later wrote out to be used by others who would welcome a similar distraction, can help to de-escalate the intensity of such a moment and shift you from a crisis state to a calmer one.
Feeling overwhelmed and finding it hard to focus and/or relax with breathing? Try bringing some awareness to your body first by stomping your feet on the ground for a bit or lightly snapping a rubber band on your wrist. Ready for some more? Try tackling a couple of these questions in a cozy space.
3 Favourite Things
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that make you happy (ex. a purring cat)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that you always look forward to (ex. having a cup of tea)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that calm you after a stressful day (ex. taking a bubble bath)
3 Favourite Senses
- Think of 3 of your favourite colours (ex. turquoise)
- Think of 3 of your favourite scents (ex. lavender)
- Think of 3 of your favourite textures or fabrics (ex. silk)
- Think of 3 of your favourite sounds (ex. the waves of the ocean)
- Think of 3 of your favourite foods to eat (ex. chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream)
3 Favourite Activities
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that help you feel good (ex. yoga)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that help you feel refreshed (ex. a hot/cold shower)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that you like to do (ex. people-watching from indoors)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that you like to read and/or watch (ex. Lord of the Rings)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that you like to do at the beach (ex. make a sandcastle)
3 Favourite Letters
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that start with the letter A
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that start with your favourite letter
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that start with the first letter of your name
3 Favourite Colours
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that are purple
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that are your favourite colour
- Think of 3 of your favourite things that are the colour of your shirt
Want Some More?
- Think of 3 of your favourite teas and/or drinks (ex. Earl Grey tea)
- Think of 3 of your favourite animals and/or pets (ex. a corgi)
- Think of 3 of your favourite hobbies (ex. cooking)
- Think of 3 of your favourite flowers (ex. peonies)
- Think of 3 of your favourite desserts (ex. chocolate cake)
- Think of 3 of your favourite candies or chocolates (ex. Kit Kats)
- Think of 3 of your favourite fruits (ex. mangoes)
- Think of 3 of your favourite quotes and/or mantras (ex. “I am strong”)
- Think of 3 of your favourite things about yourself that make you proud of how far you’ve come 🙂
This list is not exhaustive and you can easily come up with similar prompts of your own!
I hope you find this helpful and feel free to comment your answer to any one of these. I am interested to hear what you think 🙂
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